Not too long after that I was having a conversation with a friend and he said, "I think what we all want is just to be known."
Recently I read the following blog article and this longing to be known resonated again.
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/glennon-melton/the-questions-that-will-save-your-relationships_b_4618254.html?utm_hp_ref=fb&src=sp&comm_ref=false
I have noticed that God works thematically in my life. One day I will realize that I have heard the same general theme coming from multiple sources and it's like He is saying, "Pay attention! I am trying to tell you something here." So this is my current theme. To be known. To be in authentic community. To know God. And others.
One of the critical mistakes I believe we can make, is to equate our relationship with others as equal to, or indicative of, our relationship with God. For example, if who I believe God is, is wrapped up in how I feel about my pastor, or my small group leader, I will eventually be disappointed… no matter how great my pastor or small group leader is. Why? Because they aren't God. Christian community was never intended to be a substitute for a personal relationship with God. And how does this relate to being known? Because this morning I realized, for maybe the first time, that I am perfectly comfortable with my relationship with God. There is no struggle for authenticity there. He knows me. Intimately. And I am getting to know Him too. Little by little He is revealing more of Himself to me. Where fear sets in- where I struggle to be real- is with God's people. It is within the context of community where I feel I have to have it all together (and the tension that is created there because I know that I don't). I know God loves me unconditionally. But will they? I know God sees me. But do they? And I know that He forgives. But will they?
And for me, that is probably why conflict and stress always have been good motivators to draw me closer to God. Because when I am disappointed by others, I remember I have a Friend who will never disappoint me. I never have to question His motives or worry that I am bothering Him with my petty problems. He's never too busy. Or too tired. Or too stressed.
I love the community that God has placed me in. I cannot imagine a better system of support or encouragement. My reality is that I can be very authentic in my present context. But I am thankful for the reminder today that no person was ever meant to take the place of my relationship with God. And He knows me… THIS I love.
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